


Guns For Hands

by Lookformealaska



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Based off of guns for hands, Depression on both ends of joshler, M/M, Shameless star loving, Slow Burn, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, joshler - Freeform, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-10
Updated: 2016-11-18
Packaged: 2018-08-07 22:52:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,017
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7732936
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lookformealaska/pseuds/Lookformealaska
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is a fic based off of the song Guns For Hands by Twenty One Pilots.<br/>Tyler and Josh meet one day while out on a walk to clear their minds.<br/>(Will be updating warnings and such along the way)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Beginning of Everything

**Author's Note:**

  * For [BlindedByFairyLights](https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlindedByFairyLights/gifts).



The sun shines through the window as Tyler sits on the edge of the bed looking down at his wrist. It shows what he has done the night before. The red scabbed over lines across his wrist show where his mind has gone the night before. How his mind had been lost in the darkness of the things he didn't know and how the tears and mind drove him to pull out the blade again. He swore to his parents that it would never happen again but he know what that means. It means that he will have to wear long sleeves until they heal so his parents won’t notice. But they won't notice even if he doesn't they hardly ever do. 

They don't notice how he is breaking down or how he is falling to pieces before their very eyes. They don't see him at night when he's pulling his hair and crying trying to fall asleep. When he can't quiet the raging thoughts telling him he's worthless that he should just end it all now. When he thinks about all the people out their having the same thoughts as them. They don't see any of it. They see the boy who plays basketball and goes out with friends. They see the boy who asks them about their day at the dinner table. They see the fake Tyler that he puts on for them. 

So when Tyler pulls himself out of bed he throws on his sweatshirt and skinny jeans then heads for the bathroom. When he looks in the mirror he sees a broken person. Someone who can't put the pieces back together no matter how much duct tape or glue he was given. Once he rubs a hand over his face and puts on his best fake smile he grabs his backpack and heads downstairs to greet his family.  
\------  
Tyler lays across his bed dropping his stuff to the floor. He had school that day and was very ready to be home. Being at school was exhausting. The entire time he pretended to me smiley and happy with life so his friends would think he was fine. Not even Jenna his best friend knew what he was really like when he was alone. 

Nobody knows not Brenden, Jenna, Ryan, or Debby. That's exactly how Tyler likes it. Alone. A burden to no one but himself. He closes his eyes knowing he won't actually be able to sleep but he might as well try today anyways. After a few minutes he sits up sighing and looking out the window at the sun setting.

He pulls out his computer watching youtube for a while trying to calm his raging thoughts but it doesn't work. He needs to do something to clear his head so he stands up pulling his hood over his head. He heads out the door starting to go down the road not really knowing where he was going. 

Why are you like this? Who are you? Why do you always fuck everything up? You are a fuck up. You don’t deserve to be happy. You don’t deserve to be loved. You don’t deserve anything. You are worthless. 

Tyler looked up at the stars tears starting to run down his face as the thoughts swirl around his mind. His view of the stars start to blur as tears start falling faster. Until he completely runs into something or someone rather. Tyler immediately wipes his eyes also wiping away any evidence of the thoughts that just occupied his mind.

“Oh shit I’m sorry man I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going” Tyler took a step back looking at the beautiful human being apologizing to him. He had cotton candy pink hair poking out from under a grey beanie. He was wearing a black sweatshirt and grey sweatpants. His voice itself sounded like rain falling on velvet. He was a perfect human being if Tyler had ever seen one.

Tyler had almost forgotten that he was supposed to say something back. “O-oh no man it was totally my fault I was totally looking at the stars instead of in front of me.”

“The stars, huh?” The stranger replies with a smile and a slight tilt of his head.

“Yeah I guess it wasn’t my best idea to look at them and walk at the same time” Tyler gives him a small shrug returning his smile.

“No I suppose I should’ve been looking up instead of at the ground too, huh?” The man said gaining pink cheeks to match his pink hair. 

“I guess neither of us were being very smart tonight” Tyler says a small laugh following his words.

The stranger laughs and adds, “I’m Josh.”

“Tyler. So, Josh…” Tyler pauses to glance up a the stars above head suddenly wondering what time it is. “What are you doing out so late?”

“I could ask the same to you, Tyler” Josh responds a small smile playing on his lips. 

“You could but I asked you first so…” Tyler couldn’t help but smile. He hadn’t been this playful or relaxed with anyone like this in a long time.

Josh laughed “I like to walk around at night there usually aren’t people out so it’s easier to think.”

Tyler nods knowing all to well what he means. “Me too, man.”

They stand there for a few minutes in silence until there is a buzz of a phone filling the silence. Josh pulls out his phone giving Tyler and apologetic smile typing a response then pocketing his phone once more.

“Well Tyler it was nice to meet you” Josh said a small smile playing across his lips. “But sadly I’ve got to go.”

“I should probably be getting back too. It’s pretty late. It was nice to meet you Josh. I hope we run into each other again soon.” Tyler gave a small wave before turning to go. Thoughts of the pink haired boy in sweatpants and a beanie lingering in his mind.


	2. I Have Loved the Stars to Fondly to Be Scared of the Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This time was different. This time they talked. This time they met on the swings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Sorry it took so long!!!! My computer charger broke and I've been using my phone. It sucks but what are you gunna do. Sorry if there are mistakes let me know and I'd be happy to fix them) okay enjoy!

It had been almost a week before he went out for another walk. The only reason being Tyler couldn't pull himself out of bed to go for a walk. He wanted to see the pink haired boy again but his thought kept him locked away in his room instead. One night the voices that always seemed to pester him with whispers of you're not good enough and nobody wants you began to scream he knew he had to go out. 

So he pulled himself out of bed and grabbed his black hoodie and his skinny jeans. Along with his favorite floral shoes. Then he headed for the door as quickly and quietly as his feet would take him. Once he's outside he takes in a deep breath feeling his lungs fill with the chilly air. It was nice to be out when no one else is.

He decides to follow the path he did last time. Tyler knows it's a long shot seeing Josh again but he can't help it he is hopeful. He walks along the road this time looking along the street. The only lights are the street lamps lighting up the road. Tyler likes it this way. He likes the calming feeling of being out here alone in the cold air. It's so quiet he can hear his own heart beating. 

Tyler walks along aimlessly down the road with no clue of where he is going. He finally ends up at a playground. He makes his way across the playground headed for the swings. That's when he sees him. The pink haired boy with a red beanie and sweatpants.

He walks up slowly clearing his throat. “Hey. Is uh that swing taken?” it comes out softer than he had meant it to. 

Josh looks up surprised. “Tyler? No, no of course not.”

He smiles and takes a seat on the swing next to the one Josh is sitting on. Starting to swing back and forth gently. 

“Why’re you out tonight?” Tyler asked curiosity getting the better of him. 

“Running away from my problems for a while” He said adding a small shrug at the end. “What about you?” 

“Same as you” He tilts his head back looking up at the stars. “It's easier to run away at night.” 

Neither Josh or Tyler seem to want to elaborate so they stay quiet swinging in silence for a while. 

“I like your hair” Tyler says keeping his face towards the sky. 

“Thanks. I'm thinking about changing it again. What do you think I should do?” Josh says swinging up higher. 

Tyler thinks it over in his mind for a while “Blue. I think blue would look good.” 

Josh smiles softly. “Blue it is then” 

Finally Tyler turns to look at Josh. “You know what I love about the stars Josh?”

“They are shiny?” He responds a small smile on his lips. 

“No” Tyler laughs coming to a stop. He hops off the swing turning it face Josh. “What I love about the stars is they are beautiful and when I look up at them I feel small. I don't mean in a bad when I mean the opposite actually. I feel small in a good way. Usually I am a major fuck up but you know what. All of those fuck ups don't seem so bad when I look up at the stars. They remind me that I am a part of a 7 billion group of people on one small planet called earth and we are all just a small part of this world and this galaxy. So when I fuck it it is a miniscule problem because it the grand scheme of things what is my minor problem going to change? Nothing that's what. So that Josh is why I love the stars. They make me feel like my problems aren't so big and scary and maybe I can get through them.” 

Josh doesn't laugh like Tyler is expecting him to he doesn't look at Tyler like he is crazy. In fact his eyes shine as they look at Tyler. They are full of curiosity and interest. His mouth has fallen open slightly and for a moment Tyler swears he sees the stars in his eyes.

“I never thought of them that way Tyler. That's amazing.” Josh manages to get out after a while.

Tyler blushes and looks down at his feet. “Thanks. I've never really told anybody...but then again nobody ever listened so.” 

“For some reason Josh...I feel like I could tell you that and I don't know why.” He adds a little shrug at the end. 

“It's an honor Tyler” Josh stands facing him. “You've got an amazing mind I can tell. For some reason I trust you too…. I'm glad we met” 

Tyler pulls out his phone to check the time. It is almost 4 in the morning and he isn't tired at all. 

Josh checks the time as well and sighs. “I'd better get back. I'll be dead if they catch me out this late. But...I'll see you around Ty?” it comes out as more of a question. 

“Yeah I’ll see you around Josh” Tyler says with a small smile. “don't get caught.” 

With that they both turn their separate ways with smiles on their faces and their hearts warmed. For some reason Tyler trusts this boy more then he has trusted anyone else in his life and he doesn't have the slightest clue why. All he knows is that when he falls asleep that night he thinks of a pink haired boy in sweatpants and a beanie and for the first time in a long time he dreams of something other than dark hands and red eyes. He dreams of stars and brown eyes instead.


	3. Some People Feel The Rain. Others Just Get Wet.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They meet again and this time it's Josh fanboying over the rain. Also setting it up for some angsty stuff. Sorry not particularly sorry frens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll update triggers as I go. Sorry this one's a bit short.

Tyler had gone out for walks every night for the rest of that week but Josh was a where to be found. Friday rolled around and he was starting to get very worried. Every time he got home after the walk he would always have thoughts rushing through his mind. What if he got caught and punished? What it Tyler had freaked him out? What if he never came back? 

Tonight he went out for his walk as usual hoping tonight would be different than the rest. He walked in the direction of the playground as usual. Tonight though something Tyler wasn’t sure what told him to keep going. So he did he walked and walked until he reached a bench half a mile from the playground. He looked from the bench to the sky and decided to stop here for now.

 

Tyler looked up at the stars hoping to find comfort in them like he usually does whenever he feels like this but all he could think about was the pink haired boy. That is all that had occupied his thoughts for days. He couldn’t help it he somehow felt safe with this boy. 

He looks back down to his feet finding no comfort in the stars. He sits like that for a while with his elbows on his knees looking down at the ground. He is so lost in thought and the cracks on the sidewalk that he doesn’t even notice someone sitting down next to him until a soft voice speaks up.

“Hi” it is almost inaudible but it still jumps Tyler. He whips his head around to look at the voice he would know anywhere. 

“Hi Josh, long time no see man” Is all Tyler can manage. He has so many questions just waiting to pour out of him but he doesn’t want to overwhelm Josh now that he’s just come back.

“I know, I haven't been out in a while” Josh says his voice still quiet.

Tyler waits for him to continue for a moment before he just nods and adds “I know. I’ve been out every night.”

“Oh….” Josh looks at him. “Tyler…. You know how you said you like the stars?”

Tyler nods looking at him interested.

“Well I thought since you told me something so personal...I’d share something like that with you” He shrugs looking at Tyler for some sort of reassurance and when he gets it he continues. “Well for me it’s the rain. I like the way it looks when it falls from the sky at night. The way it you know shines in streetlights at night and stuff. I really like driving through it because it’s so calming especially if you’ve got something like soft playing in the background. I also really like the sound of it. You know it rained the night before we meet on the sidewalk. I sat there and listened to it for hours on my roof. Something about it is so calming and safe. But the thing I love the most about the rain is the way it washes the place clean. You know? Maybe you don’t know. Maybe it’s just me but there is nothing I love more than the way the world looks after a rain storm. It’s like the clouds are giving us a chance to start over. Like they are washing away everything. Everything. And that makes me feel better man. I mean the feeling like I could be anybody. I thought about that a lot after we met for the first time. How we met right after a rainstorm. Almost like the universe was giving me a real chance to start over and meet someone new.” 

Sometime during the speech Josh had looked down but when he looked up again his eyes were as big as the moon. Tyler got chills down his spine. 

“That’s amazing Josh. I’ve never had anyone who has something like I do.” He was honestly stunned and couldn’t help the selfish feeling of wanting to get to know Josh and stay here forever. 

“Me either.” He drops his gaze back down to the ground.

Suddenly Josh stands up turning to Tyler. “Its been great man but I’ve got to go back.” 

Tyler stands looking at him. “Yeah okay. I’ll see you next time?” He reaches out a hand for Josh to shake.

Josh flinches away slightly out of instinct but then relaxes. “S-sorry” Josh shakes his hands.

“Maybe...Maybe I could have your number...that way we would know when one of us goes out for a walk or something?” Tyler couldn’t help but be hopeful.

Josh gives him a small smile and nods “Yeah that sounds good.”

They exchange numbers and then turn their separate ways. Both with small smiles on their faces and new numbers in their phones. Tyler had nothing but the thought of the pink haired boy in his mind. The sight of him flinching away in the back of his mind. Tyler knew he wanted to know Josh more than anything.


	4. Stars Can't Shine Without Darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Real short one just a little texting scene.

(2:36 am)  
Tyler: Hey, Josh?

(2:37 am)  
Josh: Yeah?

(2:37 am)  
Tyler: Just making sure you actually gave me the right number.

(2:38 am)  
Josh: You thought I’d give you a fake?

(2:42 am)  
Tyler: Honestly wasn’t sure man. Who knows you could actually like secretly hate me or something.

(2:50 am)  
Josh: I don’t secretly hate you. I don’t think anyone does.

(3:00 am)  
Tyler: Honestly I’m surprised most people do. Okay I’m about to pass out night Josh.

(3:00 am)  
Josh: Night.

Tyler turned on his alarm for tomorrow and then set his phone on the nightstand next to his head. Josh didn’t hate him. Josh liked him enough to give him his real phone number and actually text back. The question of what he was still doing up at 3:00 in the morning was nagging at his mind but he willed it to go away. If Josh wanted him to know what's wrong he would have told Tyler.  
So Tyler closed his eyes and tried to sleep but he couldn’t think of anything other than the pink haired boy and they way he flinched away from his hand.


	5. I don't even know what we talk about

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I changed it. Whoops sorry but I reread it and I like it better this way. But yeah still mostly texts but tyjos point of view.

It’s been a few nights since the first time and only time Tyler and Josh have texted. Tyler had found himself walking to class wanting to text him but not wanting to seem creepy or something. That’s when he feels his phone buzz against his leg. He is painfully aware of his heart beating as he pulls out his phone.

(11:54 am)  
Josh: Hey.

(11:55 am)  
Tyler: Hey. Whats up?

(11:55 am)  
Josh: The shop is completely empty. Save me from boredom? 

(11:55 am)  
Tyler: Alright. The shop? 

(11:56 am)  
Josh: Yeah I work at a record shop.

(11:56 am)  
Tyler: I’ve seen that place. I’ve never had time to stop in before but it seems pretty sick.

(11:57 am)  
Josh: It is sick as frick. It’s a really cool place to work but not many people come through.

(11:57 am)  
Tyler: Did you just say/text sick as frick…?

(11:58 am)  
Josh: I may have.

(11:58 am)  
Tyler: I’m definitely going to have to start using that.

(11:59 am)  
Josh: Lol. What are you doing free in the middle of the day?

 

(12:00 am)  
Tyler: I’m between classes. I’ve got my next class starting in 5

(12:00 am)  
Josh: College?

(12:01 am)  
Tyler: Yep :)

(12:02 am)  
Josh: Have fun in your next class! Text me when you’re done?

(12:03)  
Tyler: Totally. Talk to you later :)

Tyler pocketed his phone and walked into class. He could hardly pay attention though because of the images of the boy with the pink hair floating through his head.


	6. He likes to climb

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They climb a tree. Just trust me on this one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I changed the last chapter. I'm sorry but yeah. Also blurryface mention in this one.

Tyler awoke with a start remnants of red eyes and loud voices in his head. He wipes his forehead with the back of his hand. He looks over at the red blinking numbers. 2am far too early to be awake. He gets up anyways. He stands up and pulls on his clothing then searches the covers for his phone. Once it is safely in his hand he pulls up his messages and hesitantly texts Josh.

(2:15 am)  
Tyler: You awake?

(2:17 am)  
Josh: Yeah what’s up?

(2:17 am)  
Tyler: Up for a walk?

(2:17 am)   
Josh: Swingset? 

(2:18)  
Tyler: See you there.

Tyler pockets his phone and quietly creeps out the door. 

\-----  
When he gets to the swing sets Josh is already swinging impressively high. Tyler walks over wordlessly and starts swinging. 

“You okay?” 

Tyler just shakes his head. He doesn’t want to talk about the way the glowing red eyes follow after him in the dark nothingness. He doesn’t want to talk about how he woke up with tears in his eyes and sweat covering his body. “How come you were awake? It’s 2:30 in the morning.”

“Uh….Couldn’t sleep” Josh shrugs as best he can while slowly slightly.

“Oh.” Tyler is pretty sure he isn’t telling him the truth but he doesn’t want to drive away his new friend by accusing him of lying already. So he leaves it for now. 

“Yeah” Josh kicks the ground a bit for a moment before him swing comes to a stop. Then watches Tyler do the same. “Wanna walk?”

Tyler nods and they walk side by side down the road. “How’s school going?” 

He shrugs. “Okay I guess. My grades are pretty good the workload is a lot though.”

Josh nods. “Yeah I went to college for a year but I dropped out.” he keeps him eyes trained on the sidewalk in front of him.

“Hey your hair! I like it!” He said noticing the change in color.

“Thanks. Blue like you said.” he smiles and Tyler’s heart melts a little.

“How often do you usually dye it?” He asks.

Jenn shrugs. “Whenever the color fades or I feel like a change.”

Tyler nods and looks around the street. They’ve walked to the loop in the road with a big tree in the middle. His first instinct is to climb the tree, so he does. He walks up to the big trunk of it and jumps up grabbing the lowest branch. He uses it to pull himself up onto it. 

He looks down at Josh with the biggest grin and sees Josh return it. “What are you doing?” 

“Climbing.” Tyler says matter of factly.

“I can see that,” Josh laughs. “I mean why?”

“Because I’ve never climbed this tree before. Join me at the top?” He asked already starting onto the next branch.

As he was climbing he heard Josh below him doing a less than graceful job of climbing. He got to the top of the tree and looked up at the stars waiting for Josh.

Once Josh reached the top of the tree out of breath he looked at Tyler and smiled fondly. 

“Look at it it’s so beautiful.”

“Yeah.” There was a silence between them. Tyler looking at the stars and Josh looking at him until he spoke up again. “Do you believe in aliens?”  
“Aliens?”

“Yeah. I mean look at it all out there. You’ve got to be a certain kind of full of yourself to not believe in aliens ya know? I mean the billions of galaxies and we are the only life out there. It’s ridiculous”

“I mean yeah that’s true” Tyler looks at him a small smile playing on his lips. “Thank you.” He adds simply

Josh looks at Tyler tilting his head. “For?”

Tyler takes Josh’s hand. “For helping me” He can feel a blush creeping up his cheeks and sees that Josh as got rosey cheeks too.

“We should probably get down” Josh says after 20 minutes of sitting in the tree and looking at the stars.

“Yeah I guess you’re right.” Tyler says trying to hide the disappointment in his voice. 

They climb down the tree together in silence. They share a look quickly before turning separate ways and walking home. Both of them with rosey cheeks and a small smile. This would be their moment, their time, their


End file.
